Ooh, he's pissed.
John Mayer
posted a entry in his
official yesterday, where he made a comment about the
papz ragging on ex-girlfriend Jessica Simpson because
of the Cowboys upsetting lost Sunday night. And
seriously, he swears that it "isn't a publicity
stunt" but I think it is.
"DON'T EX
WITH TEXAS
Dear Dallas and Surrounding Areas,
This isn't a sports blog, and it isn't a publicity
stunt. (but have at me if it feels right.)
This is about doing what I think is right as a
person, in this case speaking my mind.
I have never known anyone to have more pride in their
home state and their upbringing in it than Jessica
Simpson has in Texas. I don't really follow sports,
but I have played some of my biggest and best
concerts in your state, and having witnessed how
dynamic the spirit there is, I'm betting emotions are
running high right about now.
All witty barbs, blogs, and fashion policing aside,
that girl loves Texas more than you know. It's one of
her most defining traits as a person. So please don't
try and take that away from her. (You probably
wouldn't be able to, but it's less work for all
involved.)
I just thought it would mean something coming from
the guy who has the absolute least to gain from this.
And if I'm out of line in having written it, too bad.
I can spare a Wednesday's worth of bad press if it
means sticking up for a good soul.
JM"
Who agrees
with me when I say that John is just so damn annoying
it's not even funny.
"DONT DRINK AND DRIVE!"
John Mayer
just wants to help! The
already washed up celebrity posted an entry on his
blog encouraging people to not drink and drive.
:
"UNDER THE (IMPRESSION I CAN) INFLUENCE (PEOPLE
AROUND ME)
I'm taking to the blog today to share something with
you that I feel more passionate about than I saw
coming.
I want to make it short and sweet so that anybody who
wants to re-print it can copy and paste without
editing…
Went out to dinner Thursday night. My car. One glass
of wine. Carpooled from dinner to go out to one more
place. Everyone in my car. At the next spot, I do the
Diet Coke with Lime thing. My favorite scotch
(Lagavulin 16 year) arrives under my nose. "Can't do
it," I say. Then I find out my friend has switched to
Designated Driver and has a plan that involves
everyone getting home safe. Cool. I love Lagavulin
when the time is right. Now it's the end of the night
and I'm feeling wonderfully buzzy and ready to get
dropped off to my house in my car, except the person
that was going to follow my car in the DD's car to
drive him back isn't in shape to drive either.
It's 2 o'clock in the morning. I call my housemate
Chad. Chad's sleeping. He was in the studio all day.
I explain to him that I need him to jump in the back
seat of my car, ride to the DD's car and drive me
back home. Of course Chad says "yes" and comes
through like a champ. A champ, I say.
Here's what I want to tell you:
If I, incredibly hot/fugly John Mayer can make that
call, so can you.
The distance from the parking lot to my house was
about 5 miles, mostly straight shot up the coast of
Santa Monica, zero traffic. And I didn't drive it.
Me. The guy who gets the VIP velvet rope treatment in
life.
Oh, and the call? It's not the coolest you'll ever
sound. And the logistics? It's kind of inelegant. You
trace the same route twice when all you want to do is
fall into bed. But you gotta do it.
This is all coming from a guy who you can be sure
would have found a sexier way to get home if there
was one available. And there just isn't, especially
in LA. (You can be sexy again the next day when you
wake up with the rest of your big, beautiful life in
front of you.)
I'm not writing this to earn golf claps, it's just
that if I'm going to stand in any way as an
ambassador of something cool or influential, this is
more important than any pair of sneakers or a guitar.
And to give a big high five to the Chads of the
world.
See you around
JM"
WHAT A LOSAAAAA!
John Mayer
posted has said this
about the word douchebag.
"Death to Douchebag
1 of a 129-part series on the year that was 2007,
By John Mayer
"Douchebag."
"What a douchebag."
It feels good to say, "douchebag." It's got two
different plosive sounds, the "D" and "B", and nicely
wedged between is a wonderful "sh" sound (technically
known as a voiceless palato-alveolar sibilant, at the
risk of coming off douchey) that, when preceded with
"oooooh", give your lips the sensation of sliding on
a hardwood floor in a pair of woolen socks.
And "douchebag" was on the vinegary tips of
everyone's tongues this year. Trouble is, I'm not
really clear on what it means, and I don't know that
anyone does. I know that I get called one. Pete Wentz
from Fallout Boy, by measure of a google search, is a
douchebag 11,100 times over, or the number of results
that the search engine says exist. Zach Braff, who
himself wrote one of the better films I've seen in
the last decade is also frequently 'bagged, as is
some guy named Brody Jenner. In fact, if you want to
go big, so is Michael Stipe, Bono ("supreme
douchebag"), Thom Yorke, Will Smith and Brad Pitt.
Are you as confused as I am as to what the common
denominator of douchiness is? Is it someone that
comes off obnoxious? Self aggrandizing? Ignorant? Or
is it just someone who exists out of another person's
comfort zone? And doesn't that account for almost
everyone in the world, celebrity or otherwise? Don't
most people, given the fact that they're NOT US lie
somewhere outside our comfort zone? Ohhhhh…OR…is
being a douchebag actually all about having a bigger
smile than someone else deems you deserve to in life?
I think I'm onto something here. Stick with me.
In the case of Pete Wentz, whom I can comment on
personally, I think the guy's got the job description
of musician down pretty damn well. True, it's not
your dad's rock star template, but he'd be
inauthentic if he tried to fit inside it. Pete Wentz
has a truckload of ideas. Big, bold, colorful ideas.
They're ideas that have never once had their edges
sanded down, and for that reason some people might
find him or his band too much to swallow. You know
who else had that going for them in their day? Frank
Zappa. And David Bowie. And Peter Gabriel. And Elton
John. And the Doors. Pretty much every rock band from
A-Z existed because of their ignoring conventional
boundaries. Pete's going to keep pretending. Because
that's all art really is. You puff up your sense of
pretend as big as you can and then try and live up to
it. (Maybe that's what people think being a douchebag
is?)
I personally don't mind being called a douchebag.
I've met my fair share of bloggers, and I'm much,
much taller than them. It's also because I need there
to be some push on the castle walls, so to speak. I'm
not happy when people agree. (Don't make me start
listing the names of seminal artists that weren't
either.) I think it's easier to call "douchebag" than
to confront the possibility that:
THERE ARE OTHER PERSONALITIES IN THIS WORLD THAT ARE
NOT INHERENTLY SYMPATHETIC TO OUR OWN.
Maybe I should take this opportunity to define
douchebag once and for all; I think if enjoying your
life as you choose happens to spill over into
treating others without respect, then you're a total,
world-class douchebag.
But then wouldn't that also serve as a fitting
description of the boy who cried "douche"?
Maybe it's just really fun to say."